I Don’t Think I’m a Very Good Person

A friend of mine is currently homeless. Not out on the streets homeless, but between apartments homeless. He’s been staying on relatives’ couches and in a hotel when he can afford it.

I know he’s hinting that he’d like us to ask him to stay with us, but we haven’t asked so far. In a way, it would make it a lot easier right now if he WAS out on the streets homeless, because then we’d have him move in without question.

To be brutally honest, though, I do not want him living with us, and if he did stay with us for a while, who the hell knows how long it would turn out to be? So as long as he actually has other options, as unpalatable to him as they are, I feel sort of off the hook. Sort of off the hook and pressured at the same time.

Is it wrong of me to not help him out at a time like this? It feels selfish., but I really don’t want him living here.

Kim

4 Responses

  1. Nope. It’s your home and you have to decide what to do with it. If he runs out of options, you’ll do it. But you have a line and you have to stick to it.

  2. Not at all. I think he is a nice guy but he has issues he needs to work out on his own. He needs this tough period to get back to being self sufficent.

    If you let him in you will not have an easy time getting him out and you will loose a friend in the process.

    Plus you don’t need this added stress while going through the fertility treatments. Plus wouldn’t you prefer to be able to get stuck with a 2 ft needle in the butt in your living room if you choose?

  3. I don’t know your situation completely, but I do think you have to trust your gut feeling on this move-in thing. Also, sometimes when you give someone everything they ask for, they have little to actually work toward. Maybe if he realizes that he needs to stand up and do something differently, he’ll be in a better place. Good luck with your decision!