Tag Archives: friends

Happy As a Family Singing

Published / by Kim / 3 Comments on Happy As a Family Singing

We got home yesterday from an incredible weekend of friends and music. It was just what I needed, even if there was some yucky stuff along the way that may lead to a yucky decision in the next few weeks. More about that another time, though.

Railroad Earth was way better in Woodstock than in Northampton, but both shows were worth the trip. Scott was particularly pleased to not have to drive either night, as we had a hotel within walking distance on Friday and K. was our designated grown-up on Saturday. That’s a rare treat for Scott, to not have to watch his alcohol consumption and stop drinking before intermission. A treat for me, too, really, since I usually don’t drink much when he can’t drink, either.

I discovered that a couple of people I know but didn’t know read my blog read my blog. (Did I mangle the language in that sentence, or what?) That’s always a surprise, though a nice one. Obviously, I live my life for the world to see! It’s just still strange for me, though, because I’ve been doing this for 6 years – as of last Monday – and it’s only in the past year or so that I’ve been meeting people in person who say, “Hey, I read your blog.” Sometimes I think only those of you who comment are reading.

I tried to articulate that to the first J. who mentioned it to me on Saturday, but I’d already spent the afternoon drinking my way toward the show and I think I may have ended up sounding unwelcoming, which is absolutely not what I meant.

So, hi J. and J.! Welcome!

In all, it was a really great weekend, spent with wonderful people and wonderful music. I hugged a Goat and a Hun and a Toad and had my ass squeezed by a Mouse.

And, oh yeah, yarn! I won’t even mention how much I spent at WEBS, but as K. pointed out at the time, think how much I saved on shipping!

Happy as a family
Happy hand in hand
Happy as a family singing

Happy as a banjo
Happy as I am
Happy as a banjo ringing

Greedy

Published / by Kim / 3 Comments on Greedy

An acquaintance just announced that he and his wife are expecting their fourth child. His wife is 38, which is the same age I am.

Okay, fine. They’re not greedy. They’re great parents to the three they have and they’re thrilled about the new one. But sometimes it seems like everyone else in the world is stealing all the damned fertility.

All these storms we’ll ride together

Published / by Kim / 2 Comments on All these storms we’ll ride together

I’ve been handling this IVF stuff pretty well, I think. Yeah, there was a breakdown at the end of the first cycle when it didn’t end in pregnancy, but it was a fairly short-lived breakdown and I bounced back pretty quickly.

This current cycle, I’ve been bouncing through pretty well, staying upbeat and keeping my eye focused straight ahead on only the next hurdle – cyst aspiration, start stims, retrieval, etc. – so I was pretty surprised when we walked out the door last night and got in the car, and I immediately felt like crying. I held it together and didn’t, but I felt fragile and vulnerable, both physically and emotionally, all night long. That feeling of being about to start crying went away when we got into the show and I started talking knitting with MamaLo and chatting about Ravelry with Cricket and catching Bruce up on what F is up to these days and dissecting the previous two shows with a whole bunch of other people. I guess I forgot about feeling sad for a while.

Still, when the band started playing, I put Scott in front of me and stuck to him pretty closely, because those fragile and vulnerable feelings were still there. And yet, no one was as shocked as I was when the band broke into Storms and I practically started sobbing. It threw me; I didn’t think that song could affect me that much anymore, especially because I really thought that everything was okay. But, I guess it’s not.

The crying ended when Storms ended, thankfully, though I still spent the rest of the night keeping Scott really close and being a lot more clingy than normal. I guess this IVF thing is getting under my skin more than I realized.

I Don’t Think I’m a Very Good Person

Published / by Kim / 4 Comments on I Don’t Think I’m a Very Good Person

A friend of mine is currently homeless. Not out on the streets homeless, but between apartments homeless. He’s been staying on relatives’ couches and in a hotel when he can afford it.

I know he’s hinting that he’d like us to ask him to stay with us, but we haven’t asked so far. In a way, it would make it a lot easier right now if he WAS out on the streets homeless, because then we’d have him move in without question.

To be brutally honest, though, I do not want him living with us, and if he did stay with us for a while, who the hell knows how long it would turn out to be? So as long as he actually has other options, as unpalatable to him as they are, I feel sort of off the hook. Sort of off the hook and pressured at the same time.

Is it wrong of me to not help him out at a time like this? It feels selfish., but I really don’t want him living here.